Thursday, April 21, 2016

Oh, the crash...

It happened.

I was waiting on it, and it happened.

I crashed.

I got home from work yesterday around 4:15 or so after what can only be described politely as a "trying" day. It was trying in every sense of the word. My anxiety was through the roof. It wasn't anyone's fault but my own. I know that my anxiety is a response within me that occurs when outside stimuli is just too much. I needed space to calm down, but couldn't have any because of the requirements of the job. It wasn't something that could have been controlled by an anti-anxiety medicine; it was going to happen regardless.

Anyway, after the situation had played itself out, I took my anxiety medicine - hydroxyzine. Something you can take on demand when you're experiencing anxiety or a panic attack. It works quickly to mellow you out (and, added bonus, it's also good for nausea, allergies, and several other issues!).

However, with the 24 day challenge, adding in something to mellow you out must just make you exhausted.

I could not motivate myself to do anything. I felt worthless.

I did get off the couch to cook dinner - Tilapia (made on the stove with lemon juice, salt, and pepper), Brown Rice, and Corn.

Funny enough, as I'm doing this, Nick has passed out and is snoring on the living room floor. Because of this, I'm not 100% sure it was the hydroxyzine that knocked me out. It could have been my body still adjusting to clean eating and the challenge.

Christian took a shower around 7:50. I took this time to put on PJs, take out my contacts, and wash my face. PiYo wasn't happening tonight. It was Upper Body, only 18 minutes, and I can throw it in with something on another day.

After we got Christian to bed, I just went and got in bed. Not to sleep. It was only 8:10. I just wanted to be cozy and play on my phone or something until Nick came in. Maybe, then, we'd watch Buffy.

Nope.

I woke up at 5:10 AM.

Nick said he walked in last night and I was knocked out. He took my phone from me, put it on the charger, and went to bed himself. We were asleep before 8:30 PM.

That's insanity.

Still, upon waking this morning, I felt like I could sleep more. Really, I could have slept until 8 or 9 AM at least. It's crazy. I'm an insomniac. I've been put on medication before to help me fall asleep and/or stay asleep.

Anyway, I'm still a little tired, but I have to get up and get going. I have morning bus duty today and will have kids in my room by 7:30 -_-

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Day 4 of the challenge starts today. It began like every other:

**Spark and Probiotic Restore (plus Catalyst and ThermoPlus) at 5:20
**Yoga (10-30 minutes depending on what I do)
**Check e-mails, Facebook, and whatever else.
**Breakfast between 5:50 and 6:00 (whenever I get off the computer long enough to make it)
**Blogging at 6:00
**Getting ready for the day after that.

Nick got up earlier today and packed our lunches. He didn't do it last night because he saw me asleep and wanted to lay down with me. He's a sweet guy. Couldn't let me sleep alone. (Also, I'm pretty sure that's romantic and sweet talk for "Well, if she's sleeping, I'm gonna sleep too. I'll work on stuff tomorrow when she does." Hahahahahahahaha)

I'm going to make myself a to-do list at work. I'll take it everywhere with me today. I absolutely have to make myself do things today. I'm going to need to take an extra Spark (I only had one yesterday. That could have been my issue too).

Hopefully, the crashing part is over and now I can move on to the living part :)